Tonight’s Dbacks Game for the Dogs
By Scott Allen
No, we’re not talking about the New York Mets in the literal sense and in this case not even in the metaphorical sense. Literally, tonight’s Arizona Diamondbacks-Mets game at Chase Field is for the dogs. It is bring your dog to the game night. Oh boy, I can’t wait. I have a few ideas to make it fun for the people who think this is not such a great idea.
Now, before I start I do want to say I love dogs, just not a baseball game. I don’t go poop at their parks, they shouldn’t come poop at mine. Plus, I can only imagine the barking. Holy cow, first dog that barks in my ear….
So, whose bright idea was this? I realize other teams have had similar promos. The Florida Marlins just had one last night. They even made ESPN Sportscenter highlights. That’s how crappy things have gotten in Miami. However, in this age of trying everything to get people to fill the stands, one idea that has never entered my mind has been to fill those stands with non-humans. I mean, let’s just go get cardboard cutouts. That would be fun, no? They do it in the movies.
A friend of mine, who hopefully someday will be able to contribute to this blog, had a great idea. How about instead of throwing balls back after home runs. Let’s toss dogs into the field. Now, not injuring them of course, but just carrying them over the wall and onto the grass? Then leave them in there and let them run after the fly balls. That would be some real excitement.
How about we let them on the field before the game and let them poop all over the place but leave the droppings on the field for game play. That would make things really interesting. Or, maybe we let them run the bases for us. So, the dog is every batter’s ghost runner. Sure would make guys like Miguel Montero look a lot faster.
Seriously though, I can’t imagine this promo being anything but a disaster and I expect to be there tonight to witness it all in its glory. Clearly the Dbacks are stretching for ideas. I’ll be the first to admit if it doesn’t turn out that bad, but if I get bitten on the concourse or in my seats, I’m suing. You’ve been forewarned.