Dbacks Fans Should Revolt like Colts Fans

You’ve undoubtedly heard about the NFL’s Indianapolis Colts and their march towards “imperfection” this past Sunday when they pulled all their starters in favor of resting for the playoffs and how an Indianapolis City Councilman has called for fan refunds.  I love it.  It’s a great idea.  As I sat here, I thought about all the reasons the Dbacks fans could do the same.

• The roof.  Why in God’s name do we want the roof open, even at night, in June when the temperature hit 107 outside?  103 in the shade at night still sucks!  The sun might not be on us, but the heat is still there.  I am all for the roof being open on cooler days, which they don’t even do very often in day games, but how many times did they end up opening the roof for night games in the summer last season?
• Keeping Eric Byrnes.  This made as about as much sense as someone showing The Family Guy in a second grade classroom.
• The post game concert and fireworks seating.  I realize this is a baseball stadium and there is only so much you can do, but telling people you can sit where ever you want but telling them where the best seats are and then having the Seat Nazi’s, or as you might call them, ushers, tell you that you need to move.
• Josh Byrnes
• A.J. Hinch…although I think Hinch is a nice guy and has somewhat a good head for baseball, he’s not the right guy I don’t think for this team
• Taco Bell promotion.  Score 8 runs and get 3 free tacos with soda purchase?  We have to pay to get something for free?  What happened to the days of free fries from McDonalds or Thirstbusters from Circle K?
• Ken Kendrick
• The Home Run Porch.  Let me tell you, great seats, great view.  My family and I sat there for an Astros-Dbacks game in May and they weren’t cheap even on the discount I got them on.  However, if you are going to tout unlimited food service, how about providing service?  Servers came to us about as often as 10 game win seasons for the Arizona Cardinals.
• The Gila River Home Run promotion.  Are you getting the sense of a theme here?  So, the Dbacks had a promotion if a Dbacks player hit a HR during the home run inning and hit the small target in left or right field during that inning, a huge jackpot would be won by a lucky fan.  There was about as much chance of this happening as Charlie Sheen staying out of trouble more than 15 seconds.  I mean, how about a dollar off our next Dbacks ticket for every home run NOT hit during the inning?  Not only did the Dbacks fail to hit the targets, rarely did they even hit a home run during those innings.
• The fashion show.  If ushers really want to do their job right, keep the ladies with the high heels and dresses out of the park.  This isn’t a fashion show ladies.  This is family fun baseball….well for someone I guess.  The way the Dbacks played at times this season, I wouldn’t subject my family to on a consistent basis.
• The upper deck.  It’s just cruel to make someone pay for seats up there.  Not only do you feel a million miles from the field, the seats are small and steps long and forever – plus it’s empty 97% of the time!  Block it off except for bigger games and playoffs.  Oh…speaking of bigger games….
• Dodgers games are NOT premium games.  They are divisional foe we play like 219 times in a season.  Stop charging us like we are playing the Yankees every night.
• Finally, for now, Orlando Hudson.  How do you let this quality all-star go because he apparently cost too much, only to see him sign for less with the Dodgers than what was offered to him from the Dbacks in the first place??  Now we get Kelly Johnson?  Geez!

Hopefully I will find just as many reasons to demand people go to games after next season.  I doubt it.  I will probably find a list twice as long as this.

Scott Allen